3 Easy Ways to Quickly Identify Your 2023 Goals

Do you often find it difficult to identify what goals to set for yourself at the beginning of the year? Do you often feel there are so many things you want but don't know which among them to set as goals?  Does this sound like you? If yes, continue to read this article, and your confusion will be all gone by the time you finished reading, and you will be able to easily identify and set your year goals.

Here's the easy trick. Yes, you have many things you can achieve in the year. But each of them belongs to a different category of needs or wants. The trick is that you should first identify the category each item belongs. Then you will be able to identify whether the item is a real goal or not. 

There are three categories of goals we can have: 

1. Things that you need.
2. Things that you deserve
3. Things that you desire or want. 

I have further explained each category below: 

1. Things that you need. Your needs are things that you really need to have this year. They are things that you need to function well, stay alive, maintain your position, or keep you moving forward. These are the things that should be your most important goals this new year. 

For example, your needs may be to get a job, get to work early, be more productive at work, be more kind or friendly to people, get married, visit a family member, visit the gym, have a mentor, write an exam, write a book, read a book, or it may be any other thing that you need to do to stay alive, function well, or maintain your progress this year. 

If you fail to achieve these needs it may cost you your life, health, relationship, and jobs, or affect your progress in an area of your life. So, you need to identify these needs and set them as your primary goals for the new year. 

2. Things that you deserve.  These are things you need to have or accomplish by the reason of your age, efforts, or level of education. For example, at a certain age, you deserve to get married, have your own family, or own a house. Also, if you have a certain level of education or training, you may deserve to have some type of job position, promotion, a raise at work, or a certain amount of income. 

You may or may not have the capacity to achieve or have what you deserve, but you still need to include them in your year goals. You need to write them down and think of how you can accomplish them. 

It is important to note that what you need and what you deserve are closely related, but what you need is more important.  

3. Things that you desire or want. These are things you like to have or do. But not having them will not affect your life. You may feel bad for not having your desires or wants, but it would not cost you your life, functionality, or progress if you do not achieve them. Examples of desires may be buying a new car, buying a big house, using a smartphone, or visiting a friend. 

These are the things you need to set as your second group of goals. Should include them in your goals for the year and plan for two to achieve them. 

Conclusion. If you can identify what you need, what you deserve, and what you want, those are the lists of goals you can set for yourself this year. Get your writing materials and write down those things. Organize them according to their importance. Think about what you can do to achieve them and also write down your ideas. Put those ideas into action and you will see yourself achieving those things one by one during the year. It is important to note that you don't have to set your goals to the level of your capability, you should set your goals and then increase your capability to the level of your goals. Then you will be able to achieve great goals. 

Afraid of getting married? Avoid 10 Costly Mistakes That Cause Headaches in Most Marriages

            Imagine yourself experiencing the kind of marriage where you are appreciated, treated with respect and love, and where you are understood and prioritized. Close your eyes and see yourself getting excited to lie side by side with your partner in your master bedroom gisting about your day. You can experience these marriage realities if you can avoid some mistakes most people do while going into marriage. These common mistakes are described below: 

1. Don't rush to marry. If you rush into a marriage, be ready for the surprise of your life. When you rush into marrying someone, you will not be able to properly know the character or behaviors of the person you are marrying. You may be surprised to find out that your partner is a liar, drunker, smoker, partygoer, or lazy person after marriage. Save yourself from this trouble by taking your time to understand your potential wife or husband-to-be before you get married.

2. People don't change in marriage. Please don't marry someone you don't like his or her character. Never marry someone thinking that he or she will change after marriage. The truth is that people often don't change their character after marriage. This means that an angry person, a liar, a smoker, a lazy, a drunker, or a disorganized person before marriage often maintains their character after marriage. If you dislike or are always annoyed by the behaviors of your partner-to-be, it is better you don't marry the person to save yourself from an unending annoyance in marriage. 

3. Don't marry an unfriendly person. Don't marry an unfriendly person. If you always beg for the friendship or attention of the person you want to marry, you would ultimately beg for the friendship of the person after marriage if you happen to marry the person. To save yourself from this trouble, please marry someone that is naturally friendly, gives attention, or is attracted to you. 

4. Don't marry someone who doesn't freely speak to you. Don't marry someone if you have to pressurize him or her before speaking or dialoguing with you, or someone who gets angry every time you ask questions about his or her actions or whereabouts. This is a sign that the person may be keeping secrets from you, he or she is not really interested in you but in what you have, and he or she would keep things from you after you married. You might end up looking for someone else to talk with after you get married to such a person.

5. Don't marry a person with a superior or inferior lifestyle to yours. Don't marry someone with primitive ways, different social lifestyles, or mindsets to yours. If you love someone but the person's ways of thinking or doing things are better or inferior to yours, except you are willing to adapt to that way of thinking or lifestyle don't marry the person. The person may never change his or her ways of life or thinking after marriage, and you may end up hating yourself, feeling superior or inferior, or getting angry at your partner's behaviors every time. 

6. Don't marry a rich person if you are poor or a poor person if you are rich. Don't marry a poor person if you're rich. Don't marry a rich person if you are poor. Most times it is people's habits or their ways of life that make them poor or rich. If you are a rich person and you end up marrying a poor person, that may mean you have married someone with a poor way of life. Since people hardly change in marriage, this may make you continue to be irritated or always feel angry at the person you marry. The same goes for a poor person that married a rich person. The poor person will never understand why the rich partner does many things that he or she does. And the poor partner may feel abandoned or criticized by the rich partner.  

7. Don't marry an educated person if you don't want to be educated. Don't marry an educated person if you're not willing and ready to learn from your partner, or enroll in school to upgrade your education. The level of education of people often affects the ways they see and interpret things around them. When an educated person married a lowly educated or uneducated person, both partners may see things differently and argue a lot except they are willing to compromise their stands. 

8. Don't marry a city or village (country) person if you are not ready to adapt to the person's lifestyle. It is difficult for someone who has lived in the city or village all or most of their life to adapt or change their lifestyles or behaviors from a village lifestyle to that of a city lifestyle or vice versa. When such people (with opposites lifestyles) married each other, they may continue to strive against each other's lifestyles when they started living together under the same roof. 

9. Don't marry a hygienic person if you have a low standard for being clean. Cleanliness is a very sensitive topic for some people in certain professions like medical doctors, microbiologists, environmentalists, or health practitioners who understand how many unseen microorganisms or pollutants that accumulate in a dirty place can cause diseases and make people sick. If a person who doesn't fancy hygiene marries a clean person, except the person is ready to adapt, it may result in unnecessary headaches after marriage. 

10. Don't marry a disorganized person if you are organized. Falling in love is easy, but staying in love may be very difficult, especially when you are organized but you married a disorganized person without good character. Some people don't care about how things lie down everywhere in their house, whereas for an organized person, it is very important that things are sorted out and tidied up in their places. When a disorganized person that is not willing to adapt or change their ways married an organized individual, the organized person may become wearied from having to always return things to their original places after the disorganized partner had disorganized things. The disorganized partner might become feel critical following recurrent corrections or criticisms from the organized partner. 

Conclusion. There is no perfect marriage. A perfect marriage consists of two imperfect persons (a man and a woman) who have agreed to marry each other and live together for life with love, care, and respect. However, extreme differences between a man and woman that are not critically addressed before marriage are what result in issues that ultimately dissolve many marriages today. By critically considering the insights shared in this article, young persons aspiring to marry can avoid or reduce the possibilities of such marriage-dissolving issues to enjoy their desired marriage.